Stats Update: 345 days smokefree
Smokefree days: 345 days
Grams NOT smoked: 3450
Total savings: $4,600.00
Still NOPE. Coping with life a lot better lately and feeling more positive.
Im pleased and surprised that even when the going has been tuff ,picking up a unowot hasn't been an option.I guess its true that it does get easier.
Occasionally when I see someone smoking I think for a second ,one of those would be nice ,but its just a thought that I have control over.
Hope every ones going good.I don't blog so much now ,though I still come on for a nosy every other day.Havnt seen much of axl for a while hope your doing well mate. .Not long till our first year off unowots eh.Good to see a few familiar faces and new ones on here too
Stats Update: 339 days smokefree
Smokefree days: 339 days
Grams NOT smoked: 3390
Total savings: $4,520.00
Lifes been a bit tuffer going lately, anxiety levels off the scale a couple of times ,really had to practice ODAAT,there does seem to be light at the end of the tunnel so that's reassuring, and on the good side I havnt picked up a smoke so that's pretty amazing for me. Less than one month to go till its a whole year off the unowots. Still NOPE NOPE NOPE. (-:
Stats Update: 331 days smokefree
Smokefree days: 331 days
Grams NOT smoked: 3310
Total savings: $4,440.00
still nope ,been a bit up and down today and grumpy ,would be the same if I was smoking so no point smoking eh ,id have even more reason to feel crappy then .That's life ,the good and the not so good.non smokers have it ,so why should I expect to be different. still can laugh so not all bad news.
Stats Update: 327 days smokefree
Smokefree days: 327 days
Grams NOT smoked: 3270
Total savings: $4,360.00
Still NOPE.I havnt been on for a while as we havnt had internet access at our new place till now. weve started renovating our house ,it certainly needs it but nothing we cant handle and it will be so nice to have it all new looking and clean .Im back at work slowly getting back into the swing of things.Some days are not so enjoyable then others are good .So gotta take it a day at a time. Was thinking today wow its nearly a year since I last had a puff or a ciggarete, that still amazes me as it took so long to get there. My health is way better but still not 100 % .I am grateful that life is so much better as a result of not smoking.It hasn't been easy but it has been worth it.Hope you all are doing ok.Remember the answer to nicodemons temptations is always NOPE. (-:
Stats Update: 322 days smokefree
Smokefree days: 322 days
Grams NOT smoked: 3220
Total savings: $4,320.00
Still NOPE.moved into our new place ,no furniture till truck arrives Monday hopefully,and back to work again. finding it difficult to get back into things really. feel quite lazy ,maybe jetlag ?.It will be good to begin to get back into a normalish lifestyle again.life has been pretty unormal for a few months now.hope eveyones going good. cold at nigfht but lovely and sunny now.
Stats Update: 315 days smokefree
Smokefree days: 315 days
Grams NOT smoked: 3150
Total savings: $4,200.00
Still NOPE. Taking a while to get back to normal, had a good normal sleep Thursday night then woke up today at 2 am ,gonna be a long day.
I don't have to pick up a smoke today that's a good thing.
Hope you all have a good day.
searching for happiness
Thought id put some thoughts down as I cant sleep.Still on UK time,, for me its about 6 pm,not 2.15 am.I enjoyed my big OE ,but I had a few bad moments too ,or maybe not bad just a difficult. adjustment. The trip was a series of revelations for me.I think I was hoping to connect more with my ancestors in Scotland and Ireland,get a sense of who I am from where they came from.I was disappointed in this by finding out the real history can differ greatly from official history.There is a saying History is written by the conqerers, its not necessarily true.I don't know if this makes any sense to anyone else ,but its my story so ill carry on.I think I got too affected by the injustices that occurred in Scotland and Ireland throughout history and took it on board this brought me down to a dark place and could have ruined my holiday.It was a struggle at times to keep positive .I came to realise that I am me,I have my own choices to make .ive sometimes made choices and taken actions I regret.I can focus on this to at times and it brings me down as well.
I am realising that I am me ,no one else.I don't always get it right,and that's ok.I didn't find any more sense of who I am ,. over there.
I am who I am. I don't have any more sense of my beginning ,but I am here and now.Today is all that matters,I hope to give and be the best that I am today.
Today I will be happy with the journey,instead of being on the journey to find happiness,I may not always " Feel " happy every moment ,but I can continue to decide to be happy with all that I have and am today.
I have had to come to terms with the fact I have a mental health condition which sometimes tells me im no good and that life is pretty horrible,at those times life is a struggle and I don't see the good things in life so easily.Those are the times I used to " need " to smoke to make me feel better. its like at those times I forget what is good and lovely about this life and can only see the grey in everything.Thats also when nicodemons lies seem so much more tempting ,you know just one wont hurt,or whats the use of quitting when life is so crap.
I may well have these thoughts and times the rest of my life, but thankfully some truth has managed to sink into my consciousness ie ,No one puff is too much .If I smoke I die,thats my reality.Coming too terms with who and what I am is also why 10 months ago after countless attempts to quit smoking.I decided to use the ecig,with nicotine,its the only thing that's ever enabled me to not smoke ciggaretes for any length of time.
So far its enabled me to try and figure out a way to live in harmony with both myself and the world I live in.I see others have this race to see who can quit smoking the quickest, im like the turtle ,I just want to finish the race not win it.I smoked non stop for 40 years,this has been the toughest thing ive ever done ,if it takes me a year or even 2,to get off the ecig, then so be it .
If there is a point to this burble then maybe its ,walk your own walk,do what ever you gotta do.Ive been criticised plenty of times for apparently still smoking ,by using my ecig, The facts are I now have way better health than when I started,I can outwalk my wife up steep hills and do things I had given up because of poor health especially breathing problems.
I hope its ok to keep bloging on here . I know im a bit different ,but ive been on the ecig bloging sites and don't really relate to them,many of them just wanted to switch to a safer form of "smoking" .its an odd place to be not accepted by smokers or sometimes by ex smokers either but treated as if you are still a smokeby exes and as a freak by smokers.Any way enough burbling for now,will try to sleep now.
Stats Update: 310 days smokefree
Smokefree days: 310 days
Grams NOT smoked: 3100
Total savings: $4,160.00
still nope.heading back to Nz tommorrow. Looking forward to getting back home ,has been a great holiday.sounds like it's been very cold and wet,a well ,spring soon eh.
haven't seen Nana in a while hope your OK.
Stats Update: 305 days smokefree
Smokefree days: 305 days
Grams NOT smoked: 3050
Total savings: $4,080.00
still nope.enjoying Ireland now,it's lovely to see the sun again.
hope you all going good. Feel more confident of reaching 365 days ,one year now. Never believed I could do it back when I started.
it seems decision then the right repetitive action breeds determination to carry on and succeed.I think I can,I think I can ,I'll do it anyway woo-hoo I am ,I am doing it.
Feeling a bit green
Just landed in Dublin. Really enjoyed the Highlands of Scotland but must confess it's great to see the sun again and no rain,