Well WELL WEELLL I have just come on for the first time in over a year plus more ..... WHY ...coz I am dumb stupid & forgot the support of quitline & most of all YOU GUYZ!!!!!!!!
Long story short ...I got a phone call ........from you guessed it .....survey quitline ...6 months down the track from the last phone call..............are you still smoking .....dah ....dah .....dah .......something kinda clicked ...but it hit me tonight as I puffed on a fag...outside.....pouring rain...cold ...wind....what am I doing !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
It has taken me a week to even have the courage to go to the blogsite...to you guys ...who am I gonna see on here ....how am I going to feel ....& guess what I saw some old friends !!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! WOW !!!
I thought oh you dummy .....gave up on me ..on some great friendships...so I am about to begin my journey.... had never given up before & when I did I thought I had but dumb got dumber....& forgot so ....I am about to begin ...have not set a date ...but I am about to begin the journey again ...Love seeing you long timers !!!!! xx
Hi guys quick blog WORLD WAR 1, 2 & 3& 4 has broken out in my world ...cannot set date today ...going for a healing meditation & a little bit of mum time on Thursday!!!!!....will I last !!!!!TEENAGERS FIGHTING!!!& I mean fisty cuff fighting .... GRUMPY HUSBAND......who is being a fkn P!!!!(sorry).....united you are supposed to stand ...I have always given in ....but in my beginning of being a quitter I COUNT >>>>> & I am not prepared to give in this time ........ALL is not well in my world ...GUTTED ANGRY just want to run & never come back !!!!! WHAT ABOUT ME!!!!!....a mother comes last ....a wife is even more behind that ...trying out for an interview scared shitless !!!!17 years I have to have a CV ( A WHAT!!!!) When you set something in your mind ...I had set my goal & WTF so guys see yah soon will try to set a date ....why the Fk .....sorry team ...coz I know there is no I in team .....xxx a little sad pukeko just needs to vent ...you guys have been so much part of my journey ...xxx Thanks xxx
Yas is alive
Hi guys long time no blog....
Just to let you know that Yas is ok , scared to hell I will be talking to her tonight so far only been txting.
I asked her if I could let you all know as reading through the blogs yep we are worried about all our Christchurch family!!!!!
Unfortunately I am smoking again & trying to get my guts together to set a quit date.So far this year has been extremely stressful!!! No excuses feel like crap & extremely scared this time around.... about setting a date !!! I have let myself down & unsure what to actually do !!
It is absolutely fantastic to see a lot of you on here doing so awesome !!! Great stuff!!!
Talk soon quit family xx
Hi Honey I am home !!!
Well water under the bridge!!!!
OMG all these new faces hahahaha & boy o boy am I glad to be back ......
Sorry guys I am going back to Day 1 .....I only lasted 3 days on holiday ......laughter fun tears fighting... kids... husbands( I mean just 1 husband)hahahaha....hahahahahaha....& man I am proud of that ...I also only had 2 fags a DAY!!!!!!....& only at night ....you know ...the social drinking situation..... I had to buy 2 packets $12.00 a packet of 20 OMG !!!!!!!!!!!! ...as different crews on hahaha & I am not a bludga !!!!...hahahahaha....not only that MY SON ....crashed my car !!!! ....that tipped me .!!!!! failed BIGTIME....scared of hubby reaction...... than my car ....you know what grumpy men are like ...!!!!!!!!! hahaha are holidays not the best hahahahahahahahahahaha,,........rain ...floods ....family together hahahahahahahaha.....inlaws out laws ...no excuses ....I CHOSE ....to smoke ..learnt something tho ....kids all reacted differently !!!! ....husband ....oh boy .....Am I still proud of myself ....yep too damn right ...
Have I failed ...
only according to the stats
...It is a black & white journey & a journey I still will be going on ...I am learning STILL hahahahahahaha !!!!!
I have learnt so much I won't be a smoker who is controlled ...is it right or is it wrong ...I always said never ever take another puff !!!!
My journey especially after the mag write up ...hahahaha I got scared I saw how fat I am ...
I was scared... shocked.... vulnerable but loved the laughter on my face as I do love to laugh .....
so my journey has changed a little bit ....
Actually made me stronger ...made me think more ...& yep I am a non smoker & yep fkd up ....but you know what I COUNT & IF I HAD NEVER COME ON HERE omg I would not have learnt anything so yep I still will stand tall & proud & say too damn right I AM PROUD OF ME & MY JOURNEY & thank you team for you xxx
So I am back to Day 1 & we are a team ...there is no I in team xx
Sorry guys for letting you down ......
so lets go boys(& girls) !!!! hahahahaha I"m stepping out tonight & it feels allright & Man I feel like a Woman hahahahaha xx
So I am back ...I thank all of you & LETS BEGIN !!! XXX
Hi All OLd & New !!!
hahahah well there is certainly a lot going on ...just a quick blog. Off away on holiday a real one camping wine family & friends & food hahahaha. This is gonna be the first time ever of not smoking ...nervous ...yep ...strong ...yep just got my fix from you all hahahahahahaha .
Take care of yourselves everyone & remember One Day At A Time !!!! See your great stats when I am home xx & drink the water deep breathe & laugh lots coz it makes up for the tears hahahahahha xx & do not forget you deserve this ...you count ...& treat yourselves hahahaha & ....& ....thankyou all xxx pukeko
What Have I done All Day !!!!!!
Hahahaha I have just sat on here ...what am I going to be like after 3 weeks away hahahahaha great to see all the newbies hahaha jump on board for the hardest toughest BUT BEST DAMN journey of your lives coz I tell ya if I can do this after 30 flipping years omg anyone can so just a little note or 2
Read these sites for a bit of help !!!
I have been quit for 5 Months, 4 Weeks, 1 Day, 16 hours, 52 minutes and 58 seconds (182 days). I have saved $1,304.99 by not smoking 4,567 cigarettes. I have saved 2 Weeks, 1 Day, 20 hours and 35 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 4/07/2010 10:30 PM
That one tells you right to the second about your quit journey !!( I do not count the minutes my punishment for the slip ups....I quite like it when it says 1 minute hahahahaha) xx
Thanks Tobacco for Killing My Mom ...a great site set up for us by mintyfresh xx...makes you really think !! Get the tissues xx
Never ever take another puff a pretty amazing read!!!
To you all this is a lifetime change yep it is bloody hard ...the best piece of advice I can give is read everyones blogs & take a little piece of anything that works for you ...this is a journey that begins for you & every path is different but we are all in the same boat so stand up stand tall & be bloody well proud of yourselves ...cor this is a bit deep hahahahahaha remember we are all in this together hahaha for the good the bad the ugly the mad but best of all the celebrations hahahahaha yep we own this hahahahahaha it is so neat to be back !!! xx Have a great day everyone xxx
Hi Guys I am home !!!
Yep just been reading through all the blogs ...I hated Chrismas as had to go & stay at in laws so after saying farewell to you all....(cold peas in jelly just do not do it for me!!!! ) I had a meltdown yep I had a smoke ...yep that or go to jail for harming my kids(they played up like there was no tomorrow !!!!!) I had just had enough & could not stop crying... my sis turned up & I just grabbed a smoke off her & puffed like there was no tomorrow boy.... the hit of nicotine I was so dizzy I felt like crap ..did it help me... yep at the time it did sorry to say.....but..... do I want to smoke again ...NO ...so then I come home & there is a thing up on the quitline site Had I had a smoke in the last 2 weeks.... so said yes... feel now WHY???
So like a dieter.... tasted.... felt the guilt & have moved on ...I cannot beat myself up.... as feel vulnerable enough so Happy New Year one & all remember to blog away it really really does work & help.... remember the water the 4 d's & we are all here to support one another through the good & the not so good.... One Day At A Time....
Have just had a friend round who is a smoker & she puffed away 4 smokes & it did not even bother me so feel heaps happier !!! hahahahahaha I asked how much for those $17.90 for a pkt 30 smokes OMG what a rip hahahaha wow I was gob smacked as it is nearly 6 months for me ...I will not say smokefree as have had minor slips along the way of my journey & I have to always say that just for me!!!.... & to be honest with you guys this journey is tough but so damn worth it !!!!!
.... we are a team there is no I in team so get back on to the best damn journey of your life Being smokefree I know for me the best damn decision ever made xx
MERRY CHRISTMAS EVERYONE xx
What a crazy time of the year ...quick blog ...heading away to the in laws (fun???????) !!! hahahaha take care everyone keep up the great work ...yep pretty stressed & wonder why for 1 day ...oh well still smokefree & champagne tomorrow !!! Yippee !!! love to you all & take care xxx Stay strong & breathe ...xx
has this not been the toughest journey ever in my entire life.....I am trying to bring my stats up & they are not working fk....so the journey...ohhhh the journey yep hav had a puff or two along the way but I am so proud of myself ...
I think my husband & my kids have forgotten what I am / have done along the way ...I have saved so much money hahahahaha & I am pissed off to the big time hahahahahahahhaha ...do they not know why !!! we are gonna have a great christmas .....am I stressed yep!!
Do they not KNOW I just would love to have a smoke every single day ...will I ...who knows ...but in the wise words of mistermister & mintyfresh & my other team supporters.........
(nup )but I live every day ONE DAY AT A TIME because as the streessss of Christmas comes...... mothers feel it !!!
SO.......................................after swearing /cursing hahahahhhaha
IT HAS FINALLY COME UP!!!!!
My Quit Date: 4/07/2010 10:30 PM
I have been quit for 5 Months, 2 Weeks, 1 Day, 22 hours, 10 minutes and 30 seconds (168 days).
I have saved $1,206.58 by not smoking 4,223 cigarettes. I have saved 2 Weeks, 15 hours and 55 minutes of my life. My Quit Date: 4/07/2010 10:30 PM.........................................
& yep I have slipped but I still say I am now A NON SMOKER & SO DAMN PROUD OF MYSELF
coz every day it is a ONE DAY AT A TIME & so I shall say to you THE TEAM
THANK YOU ......thank you .......coz you all have helped me so much ...past & present ....you know who you are ..dentarthurdent ..shane 36 & 76 ....mandykoo .marie..... tomaaiz.......Yas01.....ohhh there are so many of you so I thank you all ....&..... may you all have a very special Christmas & remember YOU COUNT...you all really do xxxx Pukeko xx
OH OH OH !!!
I asked for a packet of smokes at the shop this afternoon as I was buying my wine ...OMG I could not stop laughing ....lucky they know me & were like Tania what are you doing !!!!!!
Hahahaha have really been thinking about smokes lately dreamt last night that I was ...!!!! They were everywhere in my mouth & hands & I was gagging like wtf ....I really thought I was ...I even told hubby he thought I was nuts !!! coz I freaked ...as you do hahahaha
I am so glad I am not ...because we are on tank water & the pump died last night & was spraying water everywhere ...hubby got home at 3.00 a.m & heard the pump going on & off...so whew ..could have lost all our precious water !!!!!! ....so $ 540.00 later a new pump & guess what all came out of my smoke money that we have been saving ....I was so HAPPY!!!
so keep up the great work everyone ...I am going to have a glass of well deserved wine to celebrate thank goodness I do not smoke anymore One Day At A Time xx