Back from holiday and status update.
Hey guys back from my holiday with A and his grandparents. Had the best time needed the break even started eating better (more regularly used to skip breakfast) and healthier too. Stayed smoke free, went fishing and caught my first fish a nice size rainbow trout and even got the rare treat of seeing the benmore dam spillway get opened yesterday and got footage of it spilling. His grandparents insisted I call them grandma and grandad. They seem to like me have invited me back again. I'm quite pleased about that. The weather wasn't great but we made the most of the good days :) I love my man and enjoyed the time away with him.
Smokefree days: 32 days
Cigarettes NOT smoked: 480
Total savings: $248.00
Tehe excitement + Stats update x
Looking forward to tomorrow and the break I'm bout to get. Still the odd craving of course but not huge major ones just minor ones so I'm keeping busy :) It was A's birthday today he caught up to me in age lol he's 5 months younger then me. Thats one of the smallest age gaps in my group of mates. Only I'm a tad nervous while we are away I'm meeting his grandparents (maternal). It's a tad scary.
Smokefree days: 21 days
Cigarettes NOT smoked: 315
Total savings: $170.50
Thursday we go away.
A and I are going to otamatata on thursday and I'm doing well having some withdrawal symptoms occasionally but otherwise I'm doing great!
Stats Update: 14 days smokefree
Smokefree days: 14 days
Cigarettes NOT smoked: 210
Total savings: $108.50
Getting better :)
Well today my partner asked me, to go on holiday with him with his grandparents on the coast also as of tomoz 2 weeks smokefree. Cravings are lessoning, and I feel great. I hope I can go on holiday with him :)
So this evening I had an actual breakdown, I freaked out from sleep deprivation and I can't sleep anyway. A was scared and worried about me, and then when I stopped freaking out, and began to calm down he pulled me close and made me talk to him about everything. I was saying I want to leave chch and not come back, he then begged me not to leave cause after this year he has 1 year left at school, when I insisted on going he started crying and saying the sweetest most loving stuff. I agreed to stay in the end till he finishes school. I think I'm losing my mind and I really wanted a smoke through all of this. I feel terrible.
Still sick and then I find out my real father sperm donor is back in town. Great just what I need that tw*t back. He rang my home phone to let me know after I called A on his work phone and through tears I told him. He wasn't happy either and so he got home and called him and told him that I don't need his crap and he shouldn't try get contact again. I very nearly have in to the craving when I found that out. A is being really protective trying to keep keep away from us. Thank you babe I love you. I know how you feel about him.
Stats Update: 10 days smokefree
Smokefree days: 10 days
Cigarettes NOT smoked: 150
Total savings: $77.50
OMG, Still sick and now my man is too. So he was home today. I feel really bad though cause my mate has glandula fever and we shared a drink, now my doc tells me I got it and so does A. I feel horrible bout it. And fecking hell, sleeping on and off most of the last couple days ment the cravings are annoy the feck out of me. But A even though he was as worn out and tired and yuck as I was (stupid glandula fever) he kept me close and encouraged me which was great when my cousin who smokes came over it was like hell on earth! But I'm worn out again so I'm back to sleep.
Sick and bored
Well today I'm quite sick and can barely move from bed. So I'm bored as hell. I can't get my mind off the cravings and I was gonna go get my prescription for patches and lozenges filled today but I can't now. It's awful.