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22Feb2012 By magtonag  |  Permalink  |  Report Support me - Follow my blogs

could have been 365 days

but had the hicup in Nov, so back at 106 days. Well what a year it has been one of the darkest I ever hope to go through Had to put to sleep two cats one 19 and one 20 who were a huge part of my home life and 2 beauitful horse on the 4 Nov one 14 and one 7 both because there ripoff owners before me didn't do the right thing by them and made it my horror. still chewing gum and patching it I haven't enjoyed giving up smoking I haven't felt the health benifits yet

Profile image Julesconan22 February, 2012

Bad day mag??
Its been a hard year for most but the fact that we are still here and going strong says alot about our character.
You are doing great and inspiring others who are starting out so keep staunch, youve got this sorted.
Kia Kaha

Profile image Jassie22 February, 2012

Hugs to you Mags - what a terrible time. Hope this year is a much brighter one for you.

Profile image clarence the cat22 February, 2012

Good to see you back Magtonag!! It was an awful year for so many of us. This year has to be better. 106 days SMOKEFREE says you are already doing really well!! Congratulations!!

Profile image heironymus22 February, 2012

Hey Magtonag, so nice to see a blog from you. Hey, I don't know that anyone has actually enjoyed quitting - man, I hate it! Possibly because I've had to do it so many times?! lol
Thinking about you not having felt the benefits heathwise, you weren't off the wagon that long, were you? Perhaps you hadn't been back smoking long enough for it to really take a toll on your health? Just an attempt at putting a positive spin on it :)
Congrats on your 106 days - don't dwell on what might have been.
Take care & good luck for a better 2012 for you.

6Dec2011 By magtonag  |  Permalink  |  Report Support me - Follow my blogs

28 days in

Went to a 4 day horse event stayed on the grounds, (HUGE Trigger) made it, but I think I noticed every smoker infact one came into the truck with one, Have a sore jaw chewed gum madly Yay for PK Haven't had much control with my eating which is making me feel yuk 10 kilos in 240 days smoke free (first attempt) down to 2 pairs of pants that fit, I gave up smoking cause I could not afford it anymore nor can I afford a new wardore either, food bill was getting fairly high as well, so 2 days down of eating less it feels great when I am winning so I am facing it like smoking hour by hour day by day

Profile image trudger676 December, 2011

28 days is brilliant. When you notice these smokers... take note of how beautiful they look with they faces sucked in, how great they smell, how their chests sound when the cough, how yellow their fingers and teeth look, and how wrinkly they look! Try and look at the cup like it is half full, rather than half empty... you are filling out your wrinkles while your skin rejuvenates itself! I worried about the weight thing... but at the end of my worrying... I still had the weight thing... so now I don't worry!

Profile image ssfirefoxy6 December, 2011

wow 28 days well done. I pilled on the weight the first time i tried to quit, started smoking again and now have quit again. Still carry the weight, it really is a downer.

Im down to about 3 pants, and all of them are trackpants, i used to be a size 12, im now i size 16.

but try tackle one thing at a time, work on quitting for good, feeling more stable in your mindset of being a non smoker and then concentrate on the weighloss.

Profile image aufgehalten rauchen7 December, 2011

Hey Magtonag, great effort on the 28 days, try and not focus on the weight too much at this stage as that gives the old habit an excuse to use. Keep on the smokefree journey not just for the money side but the health and other benefits side as well.

All the best

25Nov2011 By magtonag  |  Permalink  |  Report Support me - Follow my blogs

Day 17 smokefree

Yay starting to feel in control Day 2 done and dusted with eating plan ate two pieces of toast more than I wanted but was not at the pantry all day stuffing my face here goes day 3 Going to watch my friend ride it is such a smokeing trigger at the moment fingers crossed got my gum

Profile image EmJay7125 November, 2011

You'll be right Magtonag - keep a positive mind set and you fly through. Just remember they are only thoughts and as long as thoughts aren't put into action you be sweet as. Enjoy your smokefree day. Congrats also on Day 3 Eating Plan :)

Profile image clarence the cat25 November, 2011

Sounds like you have your day sorted Magtonag!! Have a good one!!

Profile image Ady25 November, 2011

Way to go Mags, you'll get there, keep it up.
cheers

Profile image rainbowfish25 November, 2011

Awesome magtonag, that feeling of being in control is great isn't it. You'll be fine today, just relax and enjoy it:)

24Nov2011 By magtonag  |  Permalink  |  Report Support me - Follow my blogs

Day 16 smokefree

at day 16 again, but start of day 2 of eatting control. already feel so much better talk at junkie of anything :-) Got through yesterday found myself several times standing at at the pantry Today the weather is yuk so not going to be able to go for a walk.

Profile image Julesconan24 November, 2011

Water and a skipping rope!! Saved my bacon in the first month.
Also hard boiled lollies are excellent, stops you eating!

Profile image clarence the cat24 November, 2011

You're doing well. Remember slowly does it. One day at a time.

Profile image rainbowfish24 November, 2011

Lots of water helps. Often I find myself standing in the pantry just staring at the food "hmm what do I feel like?" But actually I don't feel like anything, it's just a habit and it certainly doesn't come about from hunger.
Doing fabulous magtonag!!!

23Nov2011 By magtonag  |  Permalink  |  Report Support me - Follow my blogs

way of track

At day 15 feeling ok got through bbq the smokers went out to the front section which was great of them

my way off track is this site has helped me keep on the straight and narrow with my non smoking its my eating that is sooooooooooooo out of control I eat and eat don't seem to get full, I eat because I am bored,I eat because everything taste great, I eat because it stuffing something in my mouth

Day 1 so far so good I need to go for a walk to keep busy also I need to get fitter Yesterday I slept most of the day 16 hours what a waste I need to take control, Felt soooooo lazy I am hoping by doing something each day will make me felt better body and soul

Profile image Julesconan23 November, 2011

Congrats on 15 days!! Hard boiled lollies and chewing gum can replace or prolong the eating! : )

Profile image rainbowfish23 November, 2011

You'll get there magtonag, just keep your goal in the forefront of your mind.

Profile image nette123 November, 2011

I have found that I have hard boiled lollies on me all the time now and I just pop one of those in my mouth instead of eating They started out as a substitute for a smoke but now they are just a fill in for food They last a long time to suck on and I don't feel like eating after I have had one Good luck with your journey you are doing awesome :)

19Nov2011 By magtonag  |  Permalink  |  Report Support me - Follow my blogs

day 11

having a bbq tonight with people who smoke not looking forward to it, having been avoiding situtions that I may weaken in, Having the hardest time daily watching a friend ride (must have someone with her due to having a fall) I feel sad been around horses, horses are a huge trigger, also from the top deck at stable block can see the grave of my 2 horses, tried biting my lip taking deep breaths and put on my big girl pants just suck it up and move on. Hope she dosen't think I am horrid can't stay for long nearly heading out the gate once the horse is unsaddled Scare she thinkings I am rude it was the putting down of the the 2 horses that I relasped, she has never smoked so not sure if she would understand

Profile image gamer19 November, 2011

she probably won't understand, but sure she won't think your'e rude. i can't say i know how you feel, because i don't. just wish i had words to help you.
hope your day improves and be strong tonight at the bbq

Profile image rainbowfish19 November, 2011

You're right magtonag, she probably won't really understand re the quitting thing, but she will probably understand about the horse thing. Talking to someone face-to-face is very therapeutic, especially a friend. From what I can see, it's more about the loss of your horses than the quitting. Enjoy your BBQ tonight and stay strong xx

Profile image Ady20 November, 2011

Perhaps let her know what runs thru your mind everytime you're near horse's, then she will have an understanding of your behaviour if you think she's picking up on vibe's.
Just have a friendly chat over a glass of coke or something, it might work wonders for you.
cheers

18Nov2011 By magtonag  |  Permalink  |  Report Support me - Follow my blogs

double digits

Yesterday didn't cry once, so today I aim to do the same took a walk in the spring air and stopped to smell the roses hey and I could actually smell them Have been blaming growers for years for breeding the smell out of flowers. I am going to aim for another square meter of garden weeded, not long ago could do it all in one go. but if I can do smokefree hour by hour day by day I can cope with garden sq m by sq m not sure how long it will take me get it done by its better than sitting inside and being sadden by my once beautiful garden

Profile image heironymus18 November, 2011

Fabulous plan. There's something about gardening that's good for the soul, even if it is only one square meter at a time. Glad you had a better day yesterday, hopefully today will be even better. Congrats on double figures Magtonag!

Profile image Sonz3918 November, 2011

Yes awesome plan - love it!!
I am loving my morning walks and digging in my garden too, those veges are tasting just yummy, and I can just imagine the beautiful smell of your flowers to grow.

Profile image yas0118 November, 2011

Well done, yep everything smells & tastes sweeter now.
Great work

Profile image rainbowfish18 November, 2011

Well done magtonag:)

Profile image trudger6718 November, 2011

Gardening is therapeutic... not that I have been able to grow anything and keep it alive, but I hear it works for some. You are doing really well. I did try smoking relaxing teabags once, when I was craving drugs before I gave them up, so there can be no morbid pleasure in looking at a garden that is getting dry enough to roll up, because being a confirmed member of nutters anonymous, I can tell you... it doesn't work!! LOL

17Nov2011 By magtonag  |  Permalink  |  Report Support me - Follow my blogs

OMG talk about postal

Yesterday morning I was soooooooo angry then of course the pain monster who I thought I had dealed with a few days ago reared its ulgy head So then I ended up crying, crying for myself, crying for my 2 cats, crying for myself, crying for my 2 horses then I realized that my pain meds were going to run out this morning so I washed my face ketp my head pointed at the ground got to the chemist and couldn't find my card so I walked out got home and cried for myself some more What a sookie la la
any way feeling a bit washed out, should have drank more water :-) going to aim at not crying today :-)

thanks guys for your support when I had turned into a raving venting maniac

forgot to add day 9

Profile image pomegal17 November, 2011

i sooooo know what thats like, you think theres someone there making everything go wrong and well the tears flow and they dont stop all day had a few days like that since stopping smoking 94 days now and getting fewer days like that, keep up the good work and if you need to have a day like that its ok tomorow will be different

Profile image aufgehalten rauchen17 November, 2011

Dont worry we all have melt down moments

Profile image yas0117 November, 2011

Oh its normal to have days & moments like this. Be strong you can do it.
Crying never hurt anyone its healthy :)

Profile image gerit17 November, 2011

A good cry is good for you, so don't fight it just let it go. I find it a release of pent up stress and heartache. Better out than in. We are all raving venting maniac's at some point of other, don't sweet it. It will get better.

Profile image trudger6717 November, 2011

Hang in there, I like the support you give to others... crying is healing... I have felt a little teary myself today... but oh no, I am not as courageous as you, I keep fighting it, when I probably should just have a good cry myself.

16Nov2011 By magtonag  |  Permalink  |  Report Support me - Follow my blogs

day 8

Soooooooooo Angry. Angry at people in this world, why do people lie to line their pockets and rip off others how do they jusifly it. Angry at the dog I am crying with rage today not a good day to leave the house otherwise so poor person will wear this over the top rage. Angry at myself for being over the top (sorry people just ranting)

Profile image craig197516 November, 2011

i here ya the emotions are incredible i never been so angry and happy all at once

Profile image rainbowfish16 November, 2011

Trust me, don't have a smoke! It changes nothing!!!

Profile image aufgehalten rauchen16 November, 2011

Gee glad I'm not near ya, hold on you will get through it.

Profile image Tafette16 November, 2011

Keep venting - a good scream of rage mixed with salty tears and verbal abuse at the world is good for you!!!!!! Just remember, a smoke ain't gonna change anything so keep up with the quitting and beat the hell out of that nicodemon!!!

Profile image yas0116 November, 2011

Rant away. Dont have one it wont help at all.
Deep breaths and blog away

Profile image Patsy10116 November, 2011

We totally understand!!! There have been some lucky people around me lately =......that they haven't been injured or killed so dont' worry you are not the only one.
It's part of the letting go. Vent all you like :) - but like rainbowfish said, don't be tempted, it doesn't change a thing
Hugs

15Nov2011 By magtonag  |  Permalink  |  Report Support me - Follow my blogs

1 week

feeling OK, got to stop eating sort of blame not smoking but I think its more boredom, not working at the moment so not alot to do, will have to find something free or very cheap, can't walk for long, garden even housework has to be broken into 20 minute rounds because of an injurey tried knitting lol the pain killers sort of stuff anything mentally I try to do, it has taken me 15 minutes to type this . I have run out of ideas I did get out once a day to feed and look after my 2 beautiful horses but now they are gone its hard to even want to do stuff

Profile image aufgehalten rauchen15 November, 2011

Hey Mag, keep your head up mate, I seems like a really difficult time for you. Might be good to talk to the GP and let them know you have stopped smoking and the pain killers are having a bit of an effect.
Boredom is one of the worse moments for a smoker so stay strong

Profile image Ady15 November, 2011

Mags, Try painting a canvas cos you can paint & paint & paint time again on top, it last for many years if you get a good picture & can take up a lot of time.
perhaps review some old hobby or interest you have but havent looked at for ages, just don't let yourself get bored.
cheers

Profile image Ady15 November, 2011

Ooopppsss, Congrats on 1 week & don't forget to reward yourself in some way.

Profile image rainbowfish15 November, 2011

Well done on 1 week magtonag - be kind to yourself, you're doing fabulous xx