Well done to ALL of us
I hope you are all OK on your quit journey. Some will have slipped and some will be struggling but that is normal and the important thing to remember is that you're DOING it. WE are doing it. I'm on day 50 and haven't smoked at all since my slip on day 20. Hard?..yes but possible?..Absolutely!! It can be done.
So, seeing as I am on day 50 I decided last night to ditch the half a patch I was down to. I feel confident enough to do this and I haven't done too bad today, in fact I craved less. Had a shocking headache and felt a bit low today but that could be unrelated. A big fat cry was all I needed so I had one. Tomorrow is another day. Stay strong guys.
44 Days...I did it!! Now to stay quit...
Hey guys! Well, that little question popped up again.."Have you smoked anything at all in the last two weeks?"..And this time I was able to tick the box that said 'No, not at all'. YES!! It's been some serious effort. I crave pretty much every day, some days are worse than others but I know that no matter what, a ciggy WILL NOT help! The cravings are mostly just little niggles and I bat them away like flies. I'm down to half a patch now and plan on chucking them in on day 60 *quitline: is that enough time on them?* Looking forward to being rid of them so I can put nicotine well behind me and leave it there! I don't use the gum at all anymore as after a certain ammount of time it begins to feel too comfortable, like a crutch, which defeats my purpose. Of course smokers are everywhere but instead of envying them I pity them. They may look happy but really they are only smoking because they have to and are worried constantly about where the next one is coming from. It is so nice to be free of that stress and it feels really good to have achieved such a monumentous thing. I've sort of being in a state of nothing lately! Just humming along now and then going "oh I'd love a ciggy...ah well can't have one...OK ho hum..."!!!! But I'm not worried, the important thing is I'm NOT smoking. And I'm damn proud of myself. Hope you are all well and on the wagon! Hang in there newcomers...it gets better.
One month down
Smoke free days: 33
Grams NOT smoked: 283
Money saved: $285.00
That's me so far. How is everyone going with their quit journey? Me?...well, I am still craving. I know people say that the cravings get less and less but WHEN! I understand that your attitude plays a big part in quitting and I try to be a positive person but the fact is I miss smoking and I crave often. Fortunately I am aware of the smoking trap too and I know that having a ciggy won't actually help me but make the whole situation worse so that keeps me from falling off the stupid wagon and having a puff. I now consider myself a recovering smokeaholic who, like the alcoholic, cannot even entertain the idea of having even one puff. It sucks. I can't lie and I can't sugarcoat it I'm afraid, it bloody sucks. I fight myself every day to not smoke and I am winning which makes me proud and keeps me fighting. I hope that one day I won't have to fight anymore. PLEASE people, do not let my moanings derail your success! I am succeeding too, I am just struggling in the process at the moment. We are all winning against the drug that we wish we never allowed into our lives in the first place. What I don't understand is how the government allows this shit to keep being sold. We know nicotine is addictive and is contained in the tobacco plant but why ADD arsenic and cyanide etc???!!! Are they trying to kill us off while making money at the same time?! I don't know. All I do know is I have a pretty big grudge against "The Man" right now. The price of petrol and milk alone is enough to make us want to smoke!! However, it WON'T help and let's face it...who the hell CAN afford to smoke these days? Keep fighting the good fight people, all bitching aside, we are doing the right thing. Smoking is stupid. We are not, that's why we are here talking about smoking instead of killing ourselves and others doing it.
Today so far has been interesting. It's wet and I'm broke and bored and woke up grumpy and craving which turned in to plain old anger and agony..I just wanted a *expletive* cigarette!! I thought, I'm at day 28 today, I'm bloody over this, I thought it got easier etc etc etc moan moan moan. However, as the day has progressed I've made an effort to stop bitching and decided to do something productive instead so I jumped on here...but as I logged in something new and different happened...a little question appeared asking me if I have smoked at all in the last two weeks then giving the options not at all, less than 5 times or more than 5 times. I was honest and answered yes, less than 5 times then proceeded on to here. It was just what I needed to slap me out of my funk and remind me of just what it is I'm doing here and how much I don't want to screw it up and wreck my progress. Today is the 8th day without a single puff, I want that number to increase, how devastating to have to put it back to ONE over one moment of weakness. So I'm just keeping at it and next time a little question appears I will be ticking the 'No, not at all' option if it kills me! Now I just have to work on my attitude so I'm not an arse to live with! Still using the patches..only 4 weeks to go but I'm wondering if after 8 weeks on 51.5mg of slow release nicotine I just stop or do I go on a step 2 patch or what??! I'm a little nervous. Sometimes I wonder if the patches make you crave more, like they are just a tease! Those are just my ponderings though. Has anyone else had a fuzzy head? I have a fog brain sometimes and I go to type words too fast so I muddle the letters up or type the wrong letter altogether! Hoping that passes too! Sorry if I've scared any newcomers...it's NOT all bad! It IS all worth it and we all CAN do it! One day at a time.
"One puff away from a packet a day"
Hey peoples, well I sure have had my ups and downs these last few days. Amazing highs but really rough lows. Since I made the decision to harden up on myself and stop slipping up, I haven't. Six days without a single puff, though not without some serious effort. All was going quite well but then pms came to town and suddenly all those emotions that have been scarce till now came plummeting home and blew up! Last night was awful, not so much with the emotions, just the cravings. They had died down but came back with a vengance and it took every drop of will power not to fall off the wagon. I just keep telling myself "alcoholics can't touch alcohol, I can't touch cigarettes". I am so proud of my progress and don't want to have to start over ever again, but at this stage, I kind of am feeling like I've 'lost a friend'. I KNOW it's not my friend etc it's just as though something is missing and I'd be lying if I said I hadn't thought of throwing the towel in once or twice and buying me old brand of baccy! I know in my heart that won't make me happy though and this is the right and ONLY thing to do. So I carry on, remind myself of why I'm doing this and get on with it. If your whole heart isn't in it, it just won't work, you have to REALLY want to quit. I DO. So I must carry on with the battle, which it is, daily! So many wonderful positives have come from it that make it worth it. I smell good, look good, not as broke anymore, get so much more done and the biggest bonus is I am actually relaxed for the first time since I can remember. I've become an observer of life and people and especially of smokers..did anyone see Hells Kitchen? Those chefs stress like crazy, not because they care about the cooking, because they are gagging to get to their next cigarette. I never thought I would become a 'reformed smoker' who lets face it we all used to hate but you can't not become 'reformed', we are! We've earned the right to brag! I'm so much more confident for quitting. Crikey that's enough blah blah for tonight! Thinking of all of you going through this with me. Yay us!
Nearly a month!!
First of all my heart goes out to all of you in or affected by the quakes in Christchurch. All I can do is shed tears with you and pray for you. Only during times of hardship is the spirit truly strengthened.
As for my quit journey I'm at day 23 today and doing pretty good. I thought I'd be raiding the cupboard every 5 minutes but I've had the opposite effect and have no appetite really, though I look forward to a hot meal at night. I had a couple of really bad days, a lot of anger, a LOT of tears, a few slips. I've had a maximum of 8-10 slip ups in the first 20 days and every one of them pissed me off! I overcame huge hurdles without smoking then slipped on the most silly things. This only strengthened my resolve though as I know I'm strong enough to beat the cravings so I just have to try harder and man I have been! It's been 3 days without a puff and I'll be damned if I have to put that number back to 1. Non Smoker means just that NON smoker, not even just one, not even a puff, ever. The last slip up I had gave me very intense dreams (though they have been nothing but lately) but this one really targeted the smoking issue and how every puff keeps you trapped. I'm a little nervous about coming off the patches but at the same time looking forward to getting nicotine out of my system altogether. I feel a little drained from it all really. It's a constant battle every day and I know it will get better but it sure is tiring. However, I shouldn't complain given the dreadful circumstances in Christchurch right now I'd say my meek tiredness is but a mere freckle on the face of relevance! I am grateful for my life and proud of the four 50g packets I haven't smoked.
My body is loving all this extra oxygen
Day 16 today and I'm so proud of myself. This is my first serious attempt at quitting and I've only gone and bloody done it! I know it's early days but I've come too far to go back now. It sure has had it's ups and downs but it's all worth it. I've had a few slip ups but compared to the 150 odd grams of tobacco I haven't smoked I've stopped giving myself a mental hiding, it really was so draining and it's draining enough trying not to smoke when it's everywhere you go! I've only had a couple of really bad days that led to a slip up but I've overcome them and I'm determined to continue and succeed in being nicotine free, evil fecking drug that it is. I feel so much better for quitting, far more energy and I actually want to go out and do things instead of sitting at home 'relieving the withdrawal pangs' as Allen Carr puts it. It feels really good to read his book from the other side. I used to read it and think 'oh God wouldn't it be so lovely to be free?"! Well here we are guys...FREE! Whenever the quit ads come on tv I chime in with my "11:55pm 5th February"! I thought I would be eating bad things every time I had a craving but surprisingly I'm eating less! I guess just because I'm aware that weight gain is probable and the more I gain the more I have to work off, which I can't be bothered with. So I'm trying to eat nuts instead of chocolate and the last coke I had was in the woody I drunk before I quit. I drink nothing but water, vitamin water (and wine!) now. That is pretty monumental. I honestly never thought I could do this. What a great new adventure. Every morning as soon as my brain wakes up I say to myself "I am a non smoker. I DON'T need a smoke". Although it's hard, it's also like a weight has lifted. No longer am I stressed out about my tobacco running out/needing filters or papers/my teeth staining more by the day/having to sacrifice everything including food to buy tobacco. I look forward to my little treats each week. We must remember to be really kind to ourselves. Well I think I've rambled on enough for tonight, I just had a good day and didn't crave as much despite the fact that my mum had surgery today and the nurse never rung like she said she would so I was fretting most of the day (as you do!) She is fine of course and it was really nice to walk into the hospital and not feel all ashamed about stinking like stale smoke AND not wanting to rush away from mum so I could get outside and smoke! Seeing as I had such a good day I had to blog to hopefully inspire newcomers. It does get better. Keep up the great work everyone! :-)
Two weeks today!
What a roller coaster I've been on for the past couple of weeks. It's so mentally draining fighting yourself every day not to slip up. It is getting easier but still a battle. I slipped up bad on day 10 and had 4 ciggys...turns out pms is a trigger I didn't see coming! It was a turning point for me though. I was so disapointed in myself and thought 'I can't keep doing this, this is not quitting' I don't want to just keep going from slip up to slip up. So I identified the problem, put a plan in place for the future and pulled my socks up damn quick! I haven't had a single puff since, which is officially the longest I have EVER gone without smoking. My house is so clean, the garden looks amazing, the cupboards are fuller and I'm getting so much more done. It's like my head has been buried in the sand for the last 15 years and suddenly it's in the clouds! I'm still craving really hard but only using the gum as a last resort and I'm just NOT going to let myself smoke. NHAP...that's my new thing (Never Have Another Puff) But man it's hard. Luckily I'm good at keeping busy. I'm drinking far less alcohol and tea since I quit and I've replaced Coke with Vitamin water. I'm enjoying being a little more extravagant with the shopping, I hunt out the heart foundation tick on groceries these days. Well, I'm off to enjoy some home made almond biscuits and chocolate coconut clusters, all iced of course! Love that free time! Hope everyone is doing well and staying strong :-)
Day Nine..battling on...
15 years ago when I started smoking, actually practicing how to do it, never ever did I see myself here on the equivalent of a methadone programme. You just don't see it coming, especially as a young teenager. It's sad but that's pretty much how we have to treat this. Nicotine is such an evil drug and we're all recovering drug addicts. So we must do what we have to, be it replacement therapy or sheer determination, to not have a single puff. Man it's hard! But if, like me, you're lucky enough to have someone worth living for, it keeps you motivated. I can't wait to not be addicted to nicotine. Very slowly getting used to new routines and a different lifestyle, it's all good and positive but I still crave hard and miss the post shopping/cleaning/gardening/meal/sex ciggy!! However, if I want to keep doing all those things for a long time I can't smoke. Hope everyone is battling on too. Keep it up :-)
no one said it was going to be easy
Day eight, I can't believe it. I'm still having strong cravings and I've wanted a ciggy all day. I know I don't actually want a cigarette but unfortunately my body is craving the nicotine and that's the best way to get it. I have resisted though! And I gotta say, I'm pretty darn proud of myself. I had more gum than usual today, was sick of the taste of it by this evening but it does help. I've decided I'm going to stick with the patches and gum for the full 8 weeks recommended. Mum's a nurse you see and I've always been told "you have to finish the whole course of anitbiotics or it won't work"! So with that in mind and the fact that the success rate is higher I'll put up with the stuff! I did check out whyquit.com and if that doesn't put you off smoking for life what will?! I almost cried at some of the stories of the 33 and 34 year olds who died from smoking. That's just a few years away for me. It's my new go-to website for when I'm craving. I DON'T want that to happen to me and I'm not going to let it. That's why I'm doing this and resisting that 'just one puff'. Despite the awful retched cravings it feels so good to (almost) be free of the shackles smoking clamps on you. Even little things like having a shower and staying clean afterwards instead of ponging up with smoke!! Say it with me now..."I am a non-smoker". For those struggling..hang in there and keep telling yourself you're a non-smoker. If you hear it often enough you might just start to believe it! :-)